Oxymoron

in utter clarity, my mind is confused,
when it's right to accept, my heart will refuse,
in shallow waters, my soul drowns,
when life shines, i begin to frown,
in sheer brightness, i only see dark,
in total freedom, i feel completely stuck,
when it's time to be happy, my tears fall,
when it's time to get going, my body begins to stall

oh why do i make things so complicated
why do i do this to myself?

i've been broken and twisted
and stepped on; defeated
i've been torn up and beaten
and picked on; i'm bleeding
i'm so overwhelmed
i've got nothing to fall on
this is what i've become;
an oxymoron

in simplicity i see complication
in cleanliness i see corruption
when it's time to welcome, i say goodbye
when it's time to leap, i never aim high
in innocence i see stains
in calmness i feel pain
when it's time to walk ahead, i turn around
when it's time to speak up, i never make a sound

oh why do i make things so difficult?
why do i do this to myself?

i've been broken and twisted
and stepped on; defeated
i've been torn up and beaten
and picked on; i'm bleeding
i'm so overwhelmed
i've got nothing to fall on
this is what i've become;
an oxymoron

arrogance in humility
darkness in light
wrinkles in youth
lies in the truth

i've got nothing to fall on
i'm an oxymoron