FUCK!

Life is utterly frustrating right now. I suddenly came to the realisation that I've changed myself so much to suit the bloody environment around me. For almost a year, I shared my friends with someone I mildly disliked (although that dislike has now evolved into pity) and I just couldn't be myself. It was like the forces suppressing me came from every direction, I had no way out, but to surrender. The best people in my life had moved on to better things and I was trapped in this hell hole. I never saw it as a hell hole until now. What caused this sudden change of perception, I have no idea.
I love my new friends, and no they are not something I settled for, but my life is something I settled for. I feel so, unaccomplished (if that is even the right word). I just want more, you know. I don't know what that "more" is yet but my life right now so isn't cutting it. The town I live in....I love it to bits...but I hate it so much too. It's so un-entertaining, all it seems to do it produce gossip to keep its inhabitants busy.
Don't even get me started on my "alma mater". It's a beautiful school and I am nothing short of proud to be a student there. HOWEVER, the people there have minds smaller than a peanut. And that's an understatement. I admit, I do see things differently than most, but having a tiny mind that's closed shut is a lost cause lah. HIYOH!
Point is, I'm fucking fucking lost in this stupid place right now. I just can't wait to get out. I love the people around me. But I HATE the fuckers who taught me how to hate in the first place. I hate that I have changed. I hate that I did it for people who won't do the same for me. I hate that I'm just powerless.
I'd like to leave now... PLEASE?